In Demand - I have too many men in my life! | Ask Astro-Coach by Nicki Michaels

Q. I have too many men in my life! Suddenly, they all want to be close to me, even ones from the past that I thought I was long rid of. What's going on? Is there one who will end up being the one? I don't want to alienate any of them, and I feel responsible toward them. Am I meant to be romantically involved with more than one man at a time? Is my natural tendency non-monogamous? I feel a bit old (mid 50s) to be juggling all these boyfriends.

—In Demand

A. It seems you know the answer to your own question; the big clue you offer is that you "don't want to alienate...and feel responsible toward them." This makes me wonder what you do want from the situation? With a strong emphasis in your natal 7th and 8th houses (the nitty-gritty of relationships), transiting Saturn trundling through those areas seems to have unleashed unfinished business—lessons that you have, no doubt, faced before.¹ The theme revolves around the balanced give and take in relationship (2nd house/8th house), with no misplaced guilt! Any relationship needs to be on your terms—a radical thought, I know. But it's the only way to attract the one and manage to have a rewarding and loving union—shown as a strong potential by your 7th-house Part of Fortune.

Your chart is a classic funnel pattern.² All the planets except one (your Pisces Moon) are on the western side of your chart (others), with the main planetary emphasis in the houses of partners (7th) and partners' resources (8th). Your 2nd-house Moon (innate responses) opposes your 8th-house Sun–Pluto conjunction (your own powerful needs, often projected onto the men in your life). The Moon is at the heart of the matter, as is your 1st-house Aquarius North Node (the capacity and the challenge to be autonomous, particularly within relationship).

Your singleton Pisces Moon holds the key, revealing your resonance with other's needs—like a cosmic tuning fork. It's challenging to distinguish your own feelings from people you're close to. This is heightened by the Moon's opposition to your 8th-house Sun–Pluto conjunction: the tendency to attract rather demanding men into your life, encouraging you to set your limits and stick to them.

Your closeness to numerous men for the wrong reasons is not only unhealthy—but you've been there, done that, and it never works. Separate yourself from these high maintenance males, so you can own your needs as an independent, autonomous woman (1st-house North Node in Aquarius). Once your empathic Moon is released from bondage, the natural alignment of your spiritual nature will occur, propelling you along your true Path. This shift might ultimately call in the one (though that cannot be your motivating factor).

Your new-found popularity and your urge to develop independence may have been triggered by Saturn's transit over your natal 7th-house South Node last summer, releasing the underlying tension created by the forthcoming transiting Saturn–Neptune opposition hitting natal Mars, Mercury, and Pluto (a push toward inspired thought and action).

The promise of this period³ is compounded by progressed Sun's conjunction to natal Neptune (discover your calling), trine to natal Jupiter (expand your potential), sextile to natal Pluto (develop inner strength), conjunction to natal Saturn (stick to your limits), and square to natal Venus (be true to your values). The downside of these transits and progressions can be confusion and being unduly influenced by others.

As you move through this period, before agreeing to anything, ask yourself, "If I say yes to this, what am I saying no to?" If the price is too high, take a strong stand for yourself. Your rewards will be beyond measure.