In A Dilemma - My stormy relationship with my family only gets worse.

A. Your 4th-house ruler (Pluto) conjunct your natal Ascendant indicates the potency of your family's impact on you. And Pluto's sextile to your 3rd-house Neptune-Mars conjunction, in the relationship-oriented sign of Libra, reveals a deeply held (and possibly unconscious) belief that if you just try harder to please them, the problems will disappear. That unrealistic expectation may explain why you feel confused.

Your perfectionistic Virgo Moon is in an applying conjunction to natal Saturn and in close applying opposition to natal Jupiter near the 2nd/8th-house cusps; these aspects amplify your own innate sense of inadequacy. If you could only be better, smarter, prettier — it would not only fix your relationship with your family, but your entire life. As hard as your family is on you, you are way harder on yourself.

Luckily, the planets are conspiring to support you in taking the needed steps to make your life better. First, there are the secondary progressions, which reflect inner conditions rather than outer events. Over the past two years and for two more years, your progressed Sun is conjunct natal Saturn,¹ enabling you to access your own inner strength and capacity. In October and November 2003, the progressed Moon conjoined your natal Ascendant and Pluto, releasing your deep-seated desire to take charge and to make major changes. At the same time, you reached the waning semi-sextile of the 30-year progressed lunation cycle, when you first began to see the light at the end of that long, dark tunnel.

The end of the tunnel is, symbolically, your progressed New Moon in March 2006 — truly, a new beginning when you will have the chance to grow the life you wish. Between now and then, you need to do some serious letting-go, and transiting Uranus opposing your natal Moon will help you get unstuck. This transit begins in late February 2004 and ends in mid December 2005.² This is an opportunity to release outmoded responses to life and to connect to your authentic self.

From August 2004 to June 2005, transiting Saturn conjoins your natal Sun,³ enabling you to establish to your emerging goals with a solid grounding. Focus on your new sense of direction to fully prepare for the new beginning in the spring of 2006.

Does this mean severing your ties to your family, at least for the short term? Quite possibly. Bypass extreme doubt (Sun and Uranus in Cancer square Neptune and Mars in Libra) while doing all that you can to connect to your own power (Pluto rising in Leo) and capabilities (Moon and Saturn in Virgo opposite Jupiter in Pisces). At each step on the path leading to your progressed New Moon, ask yourself: Am I being true to my authentic self? Take whatever steps are necessary, so you can honestly answer "Yes!"