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sole purpose of the Ask Astro-Coach column is to demonstrate how an astrological perspective supports better informed decisions by providing deeper understanding of real-life situations. It is not meant to replace your own good judgment, nor the services of licensed professionals, such as psychologists, attorneys, physicians, or financial advisors.
References
and Notes
To easily view footnotes while
reading the answer, hover your cursor over the
footnote number in the text, and a pop-up box will
appear.
1. For more
on this topic, see Taming
Your Gremlin: A Surprisingly Simple Method of Getting
out of Your Own Way, by
Rick Carson, Quill, 2003.
2. The first of the interlaced t-squares is: Mars-South Node conjunction, opposite Moon-North Node conjunction, all square to 12th-house Neptune. The second t-square is Saturn opposite Neptune, both square to the Moon-North Node conjunction. These t-squares would form a perfect grand cross configuration if the Mars and Saturn were within orb of a square. (I use 10° orbs for major aspects in natal charts.) 3. The personal planets are the faster-moving ones, including the Sun, the Moon, Mercury, Venus, and Mars; they operate differently from the outer planets (particularly Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto), which are called "transpersonal planets." When these outermost planets aspect personal planets in a birth chart, the person is challenged to increase their capacities beyond their normal comfort zone. 4. Using 2° orbs, transiting Pluto squares the Sun from January 9, 2003 to October 26, 2005; transiting Uranus opposes Mars from March 28, 2004 to January 24, 2006 and squares the Ascendant/Descendant axis from March 16, 2004 to January 10, 2006. 5. Using 2° orbs, transiting Uranus trines natal Venus from March 14, 2004 to January 7, 2005. 6. Learn more about the Progressed Lunation Cycle from The Lunation Cycle: A Key to Understanding of Personality by Dane Rudhyar, Aurora Press, 1967 and in the article, An Overview of Dane Rudhyar's Approach to Cycles (TMA, 2/98), by Nicki Michaels.
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Lonely
Forever?
From The
Mountain Astrologer, December-January
2005 (1)
Q. I have
struggled all my life to make and keep friends,
and my love life has been even more of a non-starter.
I feel shy and awkward, uncertain that other
people want me around, but others seem to perceive
me as dominating and demanding, too needy and
too inflexible to make a desirable friend.
This has caused almost continuous pain throughout
my life and been the source of endless conflicts
with others. Should I just "throw out" the
first three decades of my life and become someone
completely different? I feel like the only
way I can change my ways of dealing with people
and learn to build better relationships is
to alter my life, my personality, and my interests
so radically that I'd need to throw the baby
out with the bath water. Part of me is hesitant
to do this, but part of me is in such pain
that I don't care. Where do I start?
—Lonely Forever?
A. You've already started, beginning with your acknowledgment of your pain and your responsibility for problematic relationships. The short answer to your question is yes: Throw out whatever hasn't worked, and use current planetary opportunities to totally reinvent yourself by overcoming the tendency to maintain your status quo.1 For more on this topic, see Taming Your Gremlin: A Surprisingly Simple Method of Getting out of Your Own Way, by Rick Carson, Quill, 2003. The two interlaced t-squares2 The
first of the interlaced t-squares is:
Mars-South Node conjunction, opposite
Moon-North Node conjunction, all square
to 12th-house Neptune. The second t-square
is Saturn opposite Neptune, both square
to the Moon-North Node conjunction.
These t-squares would form a perfect
grand cross configuration if the Mars
and Saturn were within orb of a square.
(I use 10° orbs for major aspects
in natal charts.) in
your natal chart,
along with other planetary placements,
reveal something about the origin of your
dilemma. The intense struggle you experience can
be excruciating: a yearning for deep connection
(Moon-North Node square Neptune) versus
a tendency to be unreasonably critical
and willful (Mars-South Node square Neptune),
along with the inner turmoil this conflict produces
(Moon opposite Mars with nodes). The deep-seated
insecurity suggested by the Neptune-Saturn
opposition squared to the Moon-North Node
can amplify otherwise insignificant interactions
into major crises. Coupled with the (sometimes
hypercritical) 10th-house Virgo planets, including
personal planets the Sun (the heart of who you are)
and Mercury (how you interpret the world and express
ideas) along with the autocratic outermost planet
Pluto,3 The
personal planets are the faster-moving
ones, including the Sun, the Moon, Mercury,
Venus, and Mars; they operate differently
from the outer planets (particularly Uranus,
Neptune, and Pluto), which are called "transpersonal
planets." When these outermost planets
aspect personal planets in a birth chart,
the person is challenged to increase their
capacities beyond their normal comfort
zone. your
habitual tendencies seem impossible to
change.  Natal Chart - Lonely Forever? Source: Birth Certificate However, you can change. Natal Saturn (patience) trines those same 10th-house Virgo planets, allowing you to learn from past mistakes, and natal Moon (deepest feelings) trines Venus-Jupiter (social coherence) in the 11th house (friendship, hopes, and dreams), offering the promise of successful, lasting, deep connection with others. The current transits of Pluto square the Sun along with transiting Uranus opposing Mars and squaring the Ascendant/Descendant axis4 Using 2° orbs, transiting Pluto squares the Sun from January 9, 2003 to October 26, 2005; transiting Uranus opposes Mars from March 28, 2004 to January 24, 2006 and squares the Ascendant/Descendant axis from March 16, 2004 to January 10, 2006. manifest as the almost unbearable pain and hopelessness you describe, while simultaneously providing the driving impetus and determination to overcome this lifelong pattern of alienation. The progressed Moon crossing your Descendant (November 24, 2004) again emphasizes your relationship dilemma and your desire for change. The cosmic message? Do whatever it takes
to get the life you yearn for, and get some
professional support. Given this unique opportunity
for deep inner work, you can accomplish much
more in record time; find an experienced
therapist and dive in! Use transiting Uranus
(new possibilities) trine to natal Venus
(values and relationship connections) to
re-establish communication with old friends
and to make amends as appropriate.5 Using
2° orbs, transiting Uranus trines natal
Venus from March 14, 2004 to January 7, 2005. Identify
your emerging values around relating — first
for yourself and then for those you wish to bring
back into your life. In February 2005, you enter
the Disseminating phase of the Progressed Lunation
Cycle,6 Learn
more about the Progressed Lunation Cycle from The
Lunation Cycle: A Key to Understanding of Personality
by Dane Rudhyar, Aurora Press, 1967 and in the
article, An Overview of Dane Rudhyar's Approach
to Cycles (TMA, 2/98), by Nicki Michaels. an appropriate time
to revamp your relationship with the world as you
consider this: "What is interdependence?"
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